Quote of the day: "If we receive any additional complaints or notication of any further infractions or disturbances by yourself or your guests, you will be asked to vacate your apartment immediately."- Alicia Fuller, Residential Manager, The Greene

     So, last night I went out with Chad to this bar called The British Pub. It's a British themed bar, and they play soccer and rugby and stuff on tv's while people drink all kinds of import beers that you can't find in any stores around here. Some of them are good, but anyway. After a long night of very inexpensive drinking (our buddy Wooz's girlfriend was our bartender, and we drank about $150 in alcohol for like $20), we stopped by another buddy's apartment, right their in the upscale district called The Greene.

     The Greene is a fine shopping/dining district with an apartment complex also. Lots of nice restaurants, bars, boutiques, stuff like that. Tim is the guy we know that lives there. We met him playing hockey, and go over and hang out from time to time. Tim is a pretty cool guy, and quite a handful as a tenant, apparently. While we were hanging out and having a good time, he showed me this letter from his apartment manager: (I'd scan it if I had a scanner, so I'll just transcribe it. I promise it's real)

Dear Tim,

It was brought to my attention that yourself and some of your friends were out playing football in the town square in the middle of the night (around 3 am) in the middle of the town square, Wednesday or technically Thursday early morning 1/17/08. I was informed by several separate residents that it was very disruptive and many were not able to sleep due to the noise.

Unfortunately, it doesn't seem that you are taking any of my previous warnings seriously enough in regards to your continued disruptive behavior. I've let the chicken costume, the noise complaints, the apples thrown from your balcony, and your friends mooning other residents slide up until this point. However, although I thought we had an understanding that you would be more conscientious of yourself and your guests behavior and noise, this occurrence only days after the apple incident leads me to believe that you do not take me seriously.

Therefore, I am providing you and your father with a copy of this letter informing you that this is your FINAL WARNING. If we receive any additional complaings or notification of any further infractions or disturbances by yourself or your guests, you will be asked to vacate your apartment immediately.

If you would like to discuss this further or have any questions, please feel free to contact me at 937-###-#### or at the office during business hours.

Sincerely,

Alecia Fuller
Residential Manager

     Again, this letter is completely real. I laughed so hard that I asked him to make me a copy of it so I could blog it. I just had to share.