Sinister Ninja aka Sinja- a hilarious, handsome, well-endowed, romantic, witty, charming, talented, accomplished, professional, highly decorated, honorable, loyal, courageous, athletic, suitably when justifiably violent, mischievous, mature, immature, humble when necessary, curious, apathetic, paranoid, laid back narcissistic dipshit highest genius who has a surprisingly low opinion of himself despite his obvious awesomeness and occasional kickassery.
Quote of the day: "If your parents never had children, chances are you won't, either."- Dick Cavett
I was reading a funny little story (not that funny, actually) about someone recalling "the talk" they had received from their parents, and it got me thinking to my own "talk" I'd gotten. It wasn't really "the" talk, it was more like "a" talk, because it was very short, to the point, and actually pretty funny (in my humble and correct opinion).
I got home from my hockey game one friday night during my junior year, and was surprised to find that my father was home. He normally worked second shift weekdays, so I would literally not see him for one second during the week. We weren't getting along very well at the time, either, so I didn't mind it. You know, the whole angsty teen/suspicious parent (rightfully so) thing.
Anyway, I got home and came in, took a shower, then sat on the couch to watch some tv with my dad. I'll give a quick rundown of our conversation, and it's pretty accurate, because I think I'll remember this for probably my whole life.
Dad: About six girls came by looking for you today. (out of the blue, very deadpan)
Me: Oh yeah? (kinda surprised)
Dad: Yeah. (pause) Do you have girls over here during the week? (a little testily)
Me: No, I don't have anyone over here. (I didn't... mainly because my dad is a packrat and it was a little embarrassing as a teenager)
Dad: (and this is priceless) Did you get one of those girls pregnant? (I had not and have not slept with any of these girls)
Me: No, I don't think so. (laughing, partly from the question, and partly from my coy response implying that I'd slept with them)
Dad: You know about protection and all that? (with really no concern in his voice... kinda like he was asking if I wanted to watch 'Seinfeld' or something)
Me: (still laughing) Yeah, Dad.
Dad: You wanna play golf tomorrow? (same tone as the last question)
Me: (laughing harder) Yeah.
I love my dad but it was hilarious to mess with him a bit. I wonder if he remembers this. I think I'll ask him about it, but I'm still gonna act like I was bangin' all those girls. I miss high school.
"Okay okay okay. Here's the thing.. Sinja's alarm clock is the entire Master of Puppets album. He doesn't wake up until the last note is played. And after that, Sinja eats a bowl of razorblades and Wild Turkey. Washed down with an ice cold glass of lava. Sinja defies physical properties."- TheSarge
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